What's the difference between a ferret and a rat? Absolutely nothing. They're rodents, they'll bite you, they poop everywhere, and they're both kept as pets by people living in trailer parks. Excuse me, "mobile estates". Come to think of it, there is a big difference between the two: Ferrets are shaped like sausages, as you can see in Figure 1 below.
Did you notice something unusual in Figure 1? You'd be correct if you noticed that these ferrets' owner actually has wood floors in his/her trailer...excuse me...mobile home.
I once caught myself watching a PBS documentary about ferret people, where I learned the horrid, horrid ferret song. Congratulations, that will be stuck in your head for the rest of the day. Use this song to get it out.
Ferrets are not better than dogs. Ferrets are not better than cats. Ferrets are slightly better than birds (sorry, Brett and Tara, but it's true). According to one study, 99.9% of people would rather have an STD than a ferret. The other 0.1% of people actually have both a ferret and an STD, which they contracted from their ferret.